The game of golf provides trials for every player, independent of the players gender. However, for some women in our society, there is a special challenge.

Women in the Western world have traditionally been raised and socialized to be cooperative, polite, feminine and nice. There is implicit pressure that some women feel to make sure that they dont stand out too much or present themselves as trying to outdo or embarrass another woman. These messages can sometimes conflict with being competitive on the golf course.

In stark contrast, men have traditionally been reinforced and given full latitude to be competitive, win at all costs, and take down their opponent. In the English language, there is a lot of overlap between adjectives that describe masculinity and those that describe a competitor. Time after time men can go head to head on the golf course, do whatever is necessary to beat their adversary, and then enjoy the 19th hole with their fellow competitor.

For many women, it doesnt feel that simple. For some there is a perceived or real fear that if they are too competitive in the golf arena, that they may suffer some social consequences. Some fear being labeled as too competitive, too serious, or worse. Some women feel as though they must choose between social golf and competitive golf, as there is not as much of an overlap as it feels there is for the men.

Admittedly, this is an internal conflict that some women do not experience, as they are in arenas where this doesnt feel like an issue. Others are perfectly content to let their golf development and improvement be a priority- without concern for the potential social ramifications.

Gratefully, society continues to move toward embracing the notion that a woman can be both competitive and feminine. However, for the women for whom this inner conflict exists, it is often helpful to recognize this clash and resolve to be purposeful about coming to peace with it.

What is your goal for your game? Is it more socially related? Is it more competitively related? Are there times when one takes priority over the other? Clarifying this objective in advance of the day at the club or course can help keep things in perspective and help goals be met more easily. At the very least it can help create an internal environment that feels less confused, thus allowing the game to be one that is more enjoyable and pleasurable.

Jeff Troesch

Jeff Troesch is an internationally recognized expert in the field of mental skills training and performance enhancement and has been involved in training athletes and other elite performers for nearly 18 years. Jeff served as Director of Mental Training for David Leadbetters Golf Academies, where he was instrumental in assisting in the development of the training programs and methodology that continues to produce golf champions around the world. Jeff works with several touring professionals and amateur players - assisting them in the creation of optimal training plans and developmental strategies.

Jeff has been a consultant to several teams and organizations, including Major League Baseballs Seattle Mariners and Detroit Tigers; the National Basketball Association; the US Soccer Federation; and many other professional, collegiate, and amateur sport programs. He currently serves as the consultant to UCLA's Women's Golf program.

Jeff's work has been featured in Golf Digest; Golf Week magazine; Asian Golf Magazine; Baseball America; Fox Sports "Going Deep"; Gillette Sports Week; Wide World of Sports; Tennis Magazine; and several international publications. Jeff is also a recognized speaker for many golf related and other sport association events including the American Junior Golf Association.